Inside Delirium

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Anti-Bobby Flay Ring

Delirium (di lir` iem) n. a condition of the mind, as during insanity, in which one is restless and keeps thinking and talking wildly.
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July 16, 2001

Movies, Movies Movies!

Well, here it is, another Monday, another week without a rant...a while without one of any real magnitude. In an effort to better bolster the blog's bodacious body of BS, I'll rant about ugh..hmm, let's see, do I feel like ranting about religious intolerance, about Death Cheney? No, no, something lighter. I already did reality TV. {opens the papers, scouts around for a topic..spies the July 4th batch of movies...ok, MOVIES it is}.

Is there actually a movie worth watching that's being released this summer? The box office smash, Jurassic Park is getting sequel number 2 (like he first sequel wasn't bad enough). And, Jeff Goldblum, the only good thing in JP2 (hey Jeffy fans) wasn't even invited. He had to stoop as low as to be in a film which I'm sure will get an Oscar nomination (and which I'm going to see soon in a sneak peak [embarassed shuffle]) Cats and Dogs where, instead of playing a smart mathematician who tries to save the world from utter peril, he plays a smart animal scientist who tries to save the world fr .... point is, it's a stupid movie! He would have been better served to be in JP3. At least, the very least, it has the cool special effects. From the previews, the special effects in Cats and Dogs seem to have came out to the muppet workshop and the entire plot seems to be something a 5 year old wrote. The plot of JP3 is much the same, but who cares? It's got kick ass dinosaurs. I know, "Get off Goldblum. Get onto someone else for crying out loud! Are you obsessed with this man?" Of course not, it's not I like run a Jeff Goldblum fan site or something [embarssed giggle]. I just think the weird juxtaposition of Jeff's past glory and his apparent future is ironic. Naw, he'll get a good role eventually I'm sure. If it gets seen, it gets seen, no matter how silly a film. Egh, NEXT.
The next film is AI with the "I see dead people" kid. Isn't he like 16 by now? Gee, you'd think the kid would leave us alone already. In this he plays a android. I haven't seen the movie, but it looks like your average sci-fi android flick. Not Quite Human comes to mind. They all are about the same as the old fairy tale Pinocchio. Fake kid becomes "real", has fun along the way, weehaw. World domination and whirring effects are optional. Even if this film were good, I would never go to see it because of the tagline, "His love is real. But he is not." I feel sick to my stomach just hearing that. The kid was better off seeing dead people. People will see this for the effects and not for the "love". However, the new Final Fantasy appears to have better effects and no real kids to threaten to love you. From what I hear, no real plot either which makes it even better. At least it doesn't pretend.

What else is opening this week. Pootie Tang isn't even worth a rant. Scary Movie 2, another sequel that shouldn't have been made. Just go rent Scary Movie again. It's sure to be the same juvenile humor and the same stupid gags. Save yourself the cash.

People wonder why I never go to see movies. Can someone actually tell me which one of them is worth the $4 ticket price? [waits patiently] I didn't think so. Bah to them all.

Posted by vixen at July 16, 2001 07:18 AM

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