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Anti-Bobby Flay Ring
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Delirium (di lir` iem) n. a condition of the mind, as during insanity, in which one is restless and keeps thinking and talking wildly.
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February 24, 2002

Stripper FAQ

The Stripper FAQ

Really? Are men really this picky. I would imagine that boobs and a little gyration would be enough for any of them to tip you. I can't imagine them sitting around and thinking "MY GOD. That girl's dress is assymetirical. And look, one of her nails is chipped. Well, I'm just sick about this!" I know guys. I know guys who would go to strip bars. Trust me, they AIN'T that picky.

On a side not, my sister did strip for a time and she said "It's all about the {censored}. If you got big {censored} and you can shake them around, you'll make money. It doesn't matter what you look like." (She was trying to convince that I could be a stripper. She's really comforting. Basically "you're really ugly but you got the boobies!"

Anyway, I haven't shared any wholesome content in quite some time so I thought I would.

Posted by vixen at 07:46 PM | Comments (4)

Web Rage

I read this article. I think "computer rage" would be a more accurate term. I trashed a laptop for eating my paper (tossed it across the room). I've also cussed as I tried to put a computer together and it just wouldn't work. Then there's the damn printer. I'm always kicking that thing. I should treat it nicer but I don't really care. It's always breaking (and I wonder why, hmm).

Do you really think download times are an issue at work? Let me tell you, if you are getting pissed off because it takes hours to download Snood or because you online gaming doesn't work properly, you probably need more work you lazy bastard. Most workplace downloads would be quick one would think? Things like spreadsheets, datatbases might take a while and email.

Oh well, if it is taking hours for your database to download I think you have the right to find the guy who's gaming and wasting the connection and kick his ass. That's what America is all about!

Posted by vixen at 07:45 PM | Comments (0)

February 23, 2002

Hoorah for CT Scans :P

Well, I had my first, and hopefully last, CT scan on Friday...

The first thing the guy did was lie me on this table-like thing, and tell me to put my shoulders up to where the groove was. The guy then positioned my head, and put this strange strap with the chin cut out on me to hold my head in place. He kept repeating "don't move" which I tried not to do, but did anyway. Everything was so white in the room and it was very uncomfortable lying there not being allowed to move. The guy went in some shielded area and started moving the table, complete with me on it, into the big cyllinder which reminded me a lot of a carnival ride like the Gravitron. He started up the machine, and these red lights which circled around the inside of the cyllinder started glowing and lighting up each rectangle separately. I closed my eyes as I didn't want to see any more of the lights going around. The table I was on would move down periodically to take different pictures of my head, and finally it was done. Then the assistant guy said "she'll come in with the IV soon and we'll redo the photos. It's very important that you don't move just follow her with your eyes."

Wait a minute here...I didn't know anything about an IV. I was already freaking out before the nurse came in waving her needle. When she came in, I started trembling to the point where it was physically obvious. I could barely even talk, but I mustered out "I...h..hate...needles," between my teeth chattering. All she said was "well a lot of people don't like them." Bitch. She tied that horrible rubber strip around my arm, and told me to open and close my fist a few times. I did it, all the while dreading what was ahead. I guess the vein wasn't presenting itself because she slapped my arm a few times, and then it worked. She slid the needle into my arm and I said "ah" like I was about to scream quietly. Just then, I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. I tried fighting it back, but a couple of lone tears escaped and ran down my cheek. The nurse injected the IV and went through a list of things that would happen that were perfectly normal as the fluid entered my body. Suddenly I could feel my body getting hot from the inside out. It burned horribly, and I found it hard to breathe. Between my fright and the feeling I was getting from the IV fluid, my heart felt like it was going to burst inside my chest. She bent my elbow and let me rest my hand on my stomach while I got the last set of scans done.

I closed my eyes again and just waited for it to be over. When it was, I grew impatient and started shifting around on the table thing again. I was shaking and fighting back tears. I even said quietly "let me out of this." Finally, the nurse came by, took the IV out, and took the weird chin strap off of me. She helped me sit up and bandaged up my IV "war wound." I got up, grabbed my coat, and got the hell out of there as quickly as I could.

On the way out to my car, I began tearing up again. I felt horrible. I got to thinking about people who have things like this as part of a normal routine. I was too weak to handle the one time I've had it done...those people who have cancer and other diseases where these things are a necessity are extremely strong and I admire them. My experience really was nothing, and I admit that, but it definitely gave me a new outlook on those who deal with this constantly. I have a new respect for those people. I could never go through what they do at all.

Posted by ladyx at 11:21 PM | Comments (3)

February 21, 2002

Bloggers are complaining, egotistical freaks who write badly!

You know, I love John C. Dvorak. I really do. He's a great guy. He's funny. He's smart. He's an huge ass (he has one too). I was reading an article (out of sheer boredom and "Biochemawhat? I don't want to study.") I wandered onto this off the tech site I think. Anyway John Curmudgeon Dvorak says:

A recent overlooked Web trendóoverlooked by the mainstream media, at leastóis the proliferation of public diaries, generically referred to as Blogs....Some people need to be the center of attention. It makes them feel good about themselves to tell the world what important things they've been doing and what profound thoughts they've been having...You get to read a lot of complaining in these logs. If you think I'm a complainer, oh boy!...A lot of people want to be published writers. Blogs make it happen without the hassle of getting someone else to do it or having to write well ....
Well, the great John C. has spoken and apparently all of us all are complaining, depressed social misfits with huge egos and bad writing skills. Ok, I have to agree with some of those accusations. I'll let you decide which ones.

I want to turn this back around on John C. I don't know if he does anymore but he used to host a discussion show called "Silicon Spin" on Tech TV where he would basically share his opinion with the world. He also publishes opinions in places like PC Magazine. Why? Is his opinion so different than everyone else? Why did he want to become a columnist? Is it to tell the world his "important" opinions? It's all about ego for most writers, no matter how bad or good they may be. The kettle shouldn't insult the pot for being black.

The web is, and has been since it's been "mainstream," all about ego. John mentions vanity pages. They were the most popular medium on the web a few years back. Why pick apart something that makes the web turn round? If it weren't for personal vanity, half of the really great sites on the web wouldn't be here. Yahoo basically started out as a way for one guy to list his favorite sites. Ebay was set up to sell one person's pez dispensers. IMDB was someone's hobby. All of these can be traced back to ego, vanity and looking out for number one. I think all sites can be. I know all of mine can.

Anyway, he doesn't say blogging is bad. He just insulted me a bit so I had to share my worn out, badly written opinion. What he says may true for some (or most) blogs but it's not true for them all. I can't tell you how many times I've read a blog where all the person has to say is "I had a sandwich for lunch." "Hey, I broke my nail." I also can't tell you how many I've read that were truly interesting, funny, original and wonderful pieces of art. It's not just the big names in blogging either. There are small sites all over that haven't been discovered by the masses yet. GREAT sites. People who are much better writers than Mr. Dvorack. Then there are the average blogs (like this one). I think most blogs are "average". The writers aren't Pulitzer quality but they aren't complete idiots either. These are great reads too. Average blogs can be the most interesting, in my opinion, because of their "averageness".

Besides, everyone needs a place to vent (which is what I use my blog for). It makes society a better place. If everyone had a blog and everyone could bitch about the lady who cut them off in the parking lot and the boyfriend who dumped them, everyone would be happier. I think people would be less likely to jump out of their cars and shoot each other. Some things you don't want to share with people you know but you want to share them with SOMEONE. You want to get it off your chest. You want to rant about how pissed you are and how stupid everyone else is.

It is comforting to know someone could possibly be reading your rantings and maybe they might just agree with you.

Posted by vixen at 07:43 PM | Comments (2)

February 17, 2002

Olympics

Just thought I'd rant a bit about the Olympics.

It's a joke, really. The only events the Americans seem to be good at are... half-friggin-pipe? Since when the hell did that become an event? Curling is also strange, but I can deal with it -- it's been around forever. The biggest story seems to be the whole figure skating controversy (the latest I've heard is that judge got suspended indefinately, I dunno if that's correct or not.) Woo. Excitement, eh?

Another thing that sucks is tape delayed coverage. I mean, it really, really sucks. I could kinda understand it with the summer games held in Australia (it was, after all, on the other end of the Earth), but it's crazy now. Salt Lake City is at most two or three hours difference in time zone from me. Yet, for some insipid reason, I have to wait until 10pm to watch a hockey game that was played at 10 am. Feh. (Side note about hockey: What's the point? It seems like teams just picked from the NHL... maybe I'm not paying all that much attention, but I've heard of a good 75% of these people. It'd be far more interesting to me if more non-NHL players were involved.)

Finally, if the closing ceremony coverage is even half as bad as what the opening ceremony coverage was, I'm going to personally march to NBC headquarters and slap Costas/Couric. WTF was up with critiquing the dance? And, a little note to the camera guys -- if it's a group performance (ie, more than 1 person performing (DUH!)), it has more effect if you can see the whole thing. Don't friggin' zoom in on one person, damnit. Show as much as possible.

END RANT, and hopefully, END OLYMPICS. (When are they over? I'd love to know. Somebody please post a comment telling me.)

Posted by bard at 10:53 PM | Comments (0)

February 08, 2002

Boobs in the White House

I'm telling you guys, they're THIS big

Boobs in the White House


In the same vain as old Dubya, here's a nice photo of Ashcroft. I know this is old news by now, but I love the photo anyway. Bard pointed out this story to me. It seems that Ashy was askirred of the nude statue of Lady Justice behind him so he had her breasts covered with $8,000 drapes.

I could make a comment about the Bush administration and the symbolic meaning of covering lady Justice, but I won't. It's been done by a million AP reporters. Instead, I'll just point to the pre-drape photo and laugh and remark, "doesn't he remind you a lot of Clinton there." You gotta love the CNN photographer who took that. I know, this kind of mockery is why he wanted them covered. I still have to argue that he could have moved his little podium for a lot less than $8,000.

Posted by vixen at 07:41 PM | Comments (2)

February 07, 2002

Profound . . .

If I had a quarter for every time I was bored, I'd have a lot of quarters.

Posted by ladyx at 11:24 PM | Comments (0)

February 02, 2002

Superbowl

My superbowl prediction: Rams 24, Patriots 21.
What I wish would happen: Patriots 45, Rams 0.

And the halftime show will suck. When was the last time it was any good whatsoever?
Here's hoping for some funny commercials, anyway.

Still upset that both the Eagles and Steelers (my #1 and #2 favorite teams) didn't make it.

Posted by bard at 10:20 PM | Comments (1)

Dubya's State of the Union

Ok, am I the only one sick of Dubya only focusing on the war on terrorism? I know it was awful. I know it needs to be finished and America needed to act, however there are other issues to discuss, right?

You want to know what else frosts my cookies? The way he always refers to the terrorists as "evil people." I'm not going to argue that one way or the other but does really sound "presidential"? "Evil people" sounds like something a 6th grader would say. Then again, Dubya says lots of stuff a 6th grader would say ("There's a lot of Saudi citizens that chose to fight for Al Qaeda" for example, simple subject verb agreement here). Let's not even mention that he doesn't even know how to chew a pretzel.

I have to wonder, what would he have done if Sept. 11 never happened? He would have NOTHING to talk about. He hasn't done much else, has he? I know, we all wish it had never happened and since it did it's changed the world and it's important to talk about. But, out of his 3 points for the future of America, 2 dealt directly with what he's done since Sept. 11. I think he should have concentrated more on other things.

Posted by vixen at 07:40 PM | Comments (0)