June 01, 2001
You got Chocolate in My Peanut Butter! Oh yeah, well you got Jellyfish in my Monkey!
Did you hear what researchers did to a Reses monkey? No, not *that* (though, if any of the researchers I know are examples, they probably did *that* to the poor thing too). Recently, researcher implanted a gene of a jellyfish into a little monkey and he's still alive to squawk about it. Why, you ask? A wild kegger at the lab some scientist decided to get wacky? A practical joke on the marine biologist? None of the above. The scientist want to apply this to humans! I will be first in line when they start handing out iridescent jellyfish genes. Personally. I think glowing the dark and breathing underwater will be awesome. However, that's not where the research is going, darn!
What the scientist really want to do is mimic certain deadly human genetic diseases in monkeys because monkeys are easier and more "ethical" test subjects (I doubt anyone asked the monkey about this conclusion). Personally, I think they should round up The Monkees and test on them. It's not as if the are actually making any real contribution to society. They should have to pay society back for unleashing such terrors as "Valleri" and "Daydream Believer." Those poor little monkeys never tortured anyone like that! But I digress.
The real conundrum (don't you love that word) is that this technology is potentially dangerous and does pose an ethical question. Can you imagine what would happen if Saddam Hussein could genetically engineer an army of jellyfish-monkeys? He could take over the land and sea! I shudder at the thought. It would be even worse if he used squid! Imagine an army of monkeys who threw ink filled feces. The possibilities are endless. |*||*|What would happen if we kept inserting genes into a monkey and he became more man than monkey? Does he have to pay taxes? Does he have the right to vote? On the other hand, what harm could it be to have a monkey vote? Just have him move to Florida. He'll fit in just fine. Maybe he could even teach them a few things. We already have a monkey in the oval office! I say we should let them run for Congress too!|*||*|Seriously though, I don't understand why people in the states are so afraid to experiment with new technology. They always claim "moral and ethical issues." Do these morons think that the immoral and unethical people they are afraid of are going to cease their experiments because they don't have permission? Are the dictators of the world going to stop trying to clone humans just because the US says it's "unethical"? Nope. We might as well try to get some use out of it before the other countries in the world destroy us all. I hate the fact that since "evil can be done" with something, we shouldn't try to do anything good with it. Get off it. Evil can be done with anything. Heck, if we stopped everything potentially evil, immoral and unethical, none of us would be surfing the web right now.
Posted by vixen at June 1, 2001 01:39 AM
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